I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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Why was Uncle Monty's head damn tasty? Because he shoved it up a horses arse when it needed a shit.

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A genie walks into a bar. The bartender asks for three wishes. The genie says "okay". The bartender says "I wish I was the richest person in the world." The genie says "okay." Then He woke up

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Why dont polar bears eat peguins? Because they live on opposite ends of the earth and it would be physically imposible!!

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How many women does it take to change a lightbulb. None, Thomas Edison was a man.

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Why did Jane's parachute not open? Because a plane hit her on the way down.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get mowed down by a tractor

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Your mother's breasts sag with such severity that the late great surrealist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks.

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Major League Soccer

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Why was six afraid of seven? because seven has cold, dead eyes.

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A blond walks into an electronics store. Then she promptly walks out, as she got the wrong store.

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Why did they call the woman crazy? because she drowned her children in a lake.

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What do u do if a blonde throws a bomb at u Trigger the bomb and throw it back

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How does santa deliver presents? He doesn't, because he's not real!

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Can you spell iCup? I see you pee?

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What do you call a cow with no legs? A leg-less cow

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Why didn't Debbie go to the theme park with the rest of her family? Because she died the week before.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I have no idea, and neither does the chicken, for chickens do not possess the ability to reason.

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What did the Jewish man get for Christmas? Jews don't celebrate Christmas, therefore nothing

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TRENT EGENLAUF IS a LITTLE BOY

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Why couldn't the woman drive the car? Because she was a woman.

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Why did the man name his boy "Sue?" He had bad eyesight and thought it was a girl.

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Why did the chicken loom the road? To unlock the final boss.

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How do you make a clown sad? Rape his wife, choke his grandma and send him a video of you setting his children on fire.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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