What do you get if you mix a Bulldog and a Shih Tzu? A new breed of dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the giraffe say to the human? Nothing, but it was trying to alert the human of an oncoming bus.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Obamacare

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do you call a handyman with no arms? By his name.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do you call a baby with no arms or legs? You call a lawyer, and be sure to have him ask the mother if she took Thalidomide during pregnancy.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Pick up Lines skeet skeet skeet! JLR

thumb_up thumb_down +10

why doesnt bally lifeguard he isnt qualified

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What does a Jew and an oven have in common? Bagels.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A lion walks into petsmart and asks the cashier were the dog food is. The Cashier replies your a cat and the cat food is in isle 4 you pussy

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How do you do to stop a baby who is circling? You nail his other feet.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q: what is green, red, white, on fire, in space A: i dont know you tell me

thumb_up thumb_down +8

cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's black and white and red all over. Half a zebra

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do yo get when you cross an insomniac,an agnostic, and a dyslexic. A very troubled man.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's funnier than Justin Bieber dying in a car accident? Nicky Minaj being in the same car.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Female rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

knock knock whos there? nobody

thumb_up thumb_down +8

There once was a man from Nantucket... Who was fiscally responsible.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

so 3 guys walk into a bar.....the 4th one ducks

thumb_up thumb_down +8

you first

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Yo mama smells so bad that she has no friends and killed herself.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the blonde commit suicide? Because she hated her life.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops