What did the coal miner get for Christmas? Black Lung Disease

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Who got sarah pregnant? No one knows. She was a whore.

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Person 1: Knock knock Person 2: Whose there? Person 1: Frank Person 2: Oh, hey man. Come on in.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun, Get in the van.

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A black man walks into a bar. The barman says 'We don't serve your kind here'. The man leaves and goes to a nearby bar that doesn't have racist staff.

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Q: What is the difference between a horny college girls and a horny high school girl? A: Usually, an age will seperate people in different grades. Also, what grade their in.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

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What do you get when you have 5 Russians, a few 8 year olds, and guns? A kidnapping

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Why do black people like fried chicken? Well you see....

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When life gives you lemons, make beef stew.

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Uh, well I think of it as quirky and charming, odd weird, maybe unexpected, I could have looked it up but I am dying of lack of sleep here.

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How do you save Africa. Put a rash of bacon in and envelope.

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What does a kid with no arms and legs get for christman.... Cancer...

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Q: What has eyes but can't see, has arms but no hands and legs but no feet A: a blind man with his hands and feet amputated with cancer

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Why couldn't the hobo buy any clothes? They did not have his size available.

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How do you get a clown to stop smiling? Polity ask him to stop.

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So a Jewish Family wakes into a German Pizzeria. They were very satisfied with the service and ended up tipping the waiter 20%

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. It was a footless chicken.

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Why were the teacher's eyes crossed? She got kicked in the face by a mule.

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What's the color of a healthy kidney. I have no f***ing idea.

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25

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Cameron is a r e t a r d

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What do an eagle and a gopher have in common? They can both fly, except for the gopher

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Why was the white man chosen for the job over the black guy? He had more work experience and was clearly the better suited applicant.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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