FOOL TOP COMMENT IS MINE!

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Why did the robber wear a mask? Because he had eczema.

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How do you make an electrician fall over? You hit him hard with a lamp

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Q.What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A.Finding seventeen worms in your apple.

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how do u kill a black kid ..... stabb him in the face with a nife

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Me- hey hitler you lost soemthing. hitler- Vat? Me-world war two.

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69

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Wright flyer

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What looks like donuts but stinks of shit. Sean Big Macs socks

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Why did the Flintstones have Christmas? The Flintstones celebrated Christmas because the creator, William Hanna, celebrated it. As it is a kids TV show, you can't expect it to be factually correct.

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What did the DVD player say when a video tape was put in? You incompatible.

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The grandfather's grandson said, "They charged me $10 just for a cup of coffee!" The grandfather said, "They charged me with bayonets."

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I'm attracted to you like the earth is attracted to the sun. With a force that is inversely proportional to the distance squared.

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What's black and white and red all over? A nun that was stabbed to death.

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How do you tell if a kitten is alive? Throw it at the wall.

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Why was the middle-aged doctor morbidly obese? He liked bacon and was severely hypocritical.

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A black guy and his black girlfriend are in a car. Who's driving? Their driver. The black guy has a very prosperous career and their life is at the envy of many.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? A cripple.

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What do you call an african american child that hasn't eaten in a week? hungry.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? i know how to make a pizza

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HOLY SHIT, THIS ACTUALLY WORKS!! 1. Hold your breath? for 5 minutes. 2. Die

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What did the mute person tell the deaf person? Nothing. Even if sound could emit from his vocals the impaired of hearing person would still be unable to respond unless they have taken classes to read lips. The deaf person didn't take classes nor did the mute person learn sign language.

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A white straight man, a black gay man, and an Asian bisexual woman walk into a bar. They are enjoying their drinks until one overly intoxicated man makes a remark towards the group in reference to their diversity in race, sexual orientation, and sex. The bar crowd is enthused with the drunk man's genius in not only constructing a joke to cover all three categorical descriptions of the group, but in guessing each member's sexuality based on their respective appearances.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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