Annld so the penguin said, "This is my most casual outfit!"

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Q-why did the dog run away? A-he was Michael vick's dog

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Why are roses red ? Ass in my face .

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You shove her off the bed

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

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What do you get if you give a black man more than 5 watermelons? Jeff the Killer.

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What is brown and has three legs? A horse. It lost a leg in a glue factory.

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what gets louder as it gets smaller? a baby in a trash compacter.

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Q:What does a black guy say when you steal his fried chicken right in front of him? A:"please restrain from taking food that does not belong to you. If you had kindly asked i would have kindly given you some, and right in front of me too! In all my life I've never seen such rudeness and i grew up in the Bronx."

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How many ADD kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Let's ride bikes!

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A woman walks into a bar She is raped.

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Why won't the carny let the black kid on the carnival ride? He doesn't meet the height requirements

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A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender can you throw me a beer and the bartender says yes and he throws him the beer and the man says I can't catch I have the smallest hands in the world and the bartender says go across the street there is a guineas book of world record store an check if you h e the smallest hands and he does so the next day he goes back and asks for another beer and the bartender throws him a beer and say I cant catch cause I have the smallest feet in the world and he goes across the street and checks and he does and then the third day he goes back to the bar and asks for a beer and the bartendor throws him another beer and says I can't catch I have the smallest penis in the world so he goes to the guiness book o world record store and then goes bac to the bar and asks..... Who's austin bell?????

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A Jewish man, a christian man, and a buddist man walk in bar, They all have to much to drink and are arrested for driving under the influence while trying to get back home.

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar. Apparently he can walk now.

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A white man, a black man, and a mexican are stranded on an island. They all died.

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what do you call a cat with no tail? smithers.

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What is the different on a black guy and a bicycle ? The black guy steals the bicycle, but the bicycle dont steal the black guy. Yes, my bike got stolen ...

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is dead.

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A negro named Kanye walks into a Tavern... He's stoned to death.

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What is Mary short for? She has no legs.

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What happens if you play CS:GO? Well you loose alot of fucking money.

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Why isnt there any mexicans on star trek? Because even in the future they dont work.

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penis haha

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops