A muslim guy walks into a bar and orders a water as he isnt allowed to drink alcohol

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Im black

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A man jumped off a cliff and wished he could fly. He was hit by a plane

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A mailman walks into a bar He delivers a bill for the electricity and leaves.

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What do you call a cow with no legs? A leg-less cow

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What did the guy say when he dropped his baby? "oh no!"

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A blond walks into an electronics store. Then she promptly walks out, as she got the wrong store.

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what do dead babies and turkeys have in common? you eat them on ocasions

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What amusing anecdote did the Department of Educational Dictations officer tell his coworker? There was no amusing anecdote. DED men tell no tales.

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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Why is Taylor sad? Because she's the middle of a human centipede.

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why was 6 jealous of 7? 7 had a huge dick.

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What did the pear say to the apple? Fred, you delusions are getting worse and i'm getting a divorce.

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why did the chicken cross the rode? so it can get the seed that is between the two yellow lines, and then he walked back without getting hit by a car.

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Why didnt little jimmy have a funeral? Because he is still at the bottom of the lake where I put him.

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Wanna know what makes me smilee? Facial Muscles

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Q: What's full of different butts and smells bad? A: An ashtray.

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Whats worse the people posting real jokes on (Anti Jokes)? 911

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What do you think 3 black men want when the come and knock on your car window? They just want directions.

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A white man walks down an alley and sees two black men. They say hello and then are on their way.

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Why did the chicken loom the road? To unlock the final boss.

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Roses are Black Violets are Black I am color blind.

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So you go home and get on the computer. You have no internet so your stuck playing pinball.

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Hey babies The holocaust called, they want their screams back.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops