Your mama is so....well we've been friends since childhood and I know your mother passed away recently. So, as to refrain from being an insensitive jerk to a good friend. I will tell this joke to someone with a mother who is fat, dumb, lazy, ugly, or has a combination of these traits. Or has none of these and happens to be a nice lady with a son/daughter who just enjoys a good mama joke.

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roses are red violets are blue i have candy im about to rape you

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

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Gandalf and Dumbledore had a son, her name wasn't.

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Q: why did the train not make it to the station? A: it crashed and killed everybody on board.

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69

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Q. Why doesn't Michael Jackson like toast? A. Because he's dead.

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a seal walks into a club.

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Juan got hit by a truck Knock Knock Who's there? Juan's brother coming to stab you in the abdomen.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms or legs.

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A man walks into a bar Ouch He broke his penis So he ate it Then he saw a little boy They shaved their pubic hair together He raped the little boy He walked into another bar Double ouch

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Whats worse than not having cellphone service? Having sex unwillingly with a stranger then getting pregnant at the age of 13.

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A black man walks into a store and buys a gun based upon the increasing crime rate in his area.

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A man killed himself.

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Why didn't the man answer the Anti Joke? He had a severe mental disorder and was therefore incapable of speech.

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Why were The Beatles so popular? People across the world enjoyed their music.

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A man makes a sandwich.

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What do Michael Jackson and Donkey Kong have in common? They're both famous.

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Two peanuts were walking down the street, one was assaulted, the other was brutally raped.

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What's brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr.dre

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Joke: What do you call cheese that's not yours? Nacho Cheese! Anti Joke: What do you call cheese that's not yours? Sally's Cheese

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A ship wrecks in the South Pacific ocean. Only one man survives. He swims to a semi-deserted island, and is later eaten by the cannibal inhabitants

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Why didnt little timmy have a pencil? He was poor

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What is your view on school violence? I'm all for it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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