What's worse than getting stabbed? Getting stabbed twice. What's worse than getting stabbed twice? Getting stabbed three times. What's worse than gettin..... Why does it matter?!?!?! U should be dead by then!

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why didnt the kid get anything for christmas? santa exploded

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Why was the woman in the kitchen? She was hungry.

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you...

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Question: Whats worse then getting hit by a bus? Answer: Getting hit by a train.

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Why did you fall? Because of my buttcrack.

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Why did the first elephant fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second elephant fall out of the tree? It was tied to the first elephant. Why did the third elephant fall out of the tree? PEER PRESSURE!

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hahahahaha thats not funny

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Q:Why didnt the stoner go to college? A:Because he died of lung cancer.

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What did the man at the haberdashery say? Six and seven-eighths, bub, six and seven-eighths.

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Why did the dinosaur cross the road? It couldnt because a chicken was obscuring its path.

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why can't James swim at 2010 summer ? because james died at 2009

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What god did Bill believe in? No god, Bill is an athiest

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Why did the blond wreak her car? She stayed up a very long time studying for her mid-term exam, And therefore, was not as attentive to the flow of traffic.

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How do you get a clown off a swing? Hit him with an ax.

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What do you get when you cross a dog and a slice of tomato A really bad joke

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WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey!!!" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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What did the one battery say to the other? Nothing. Batteries can't talk.

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Roses are red,violets are blue you want me but i dont want you!

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What did pinocchio want to become? Hepatitus free.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not Suzie

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Why did the TV fall of a cliff? Because a nice man was donating it to the homeless shelter which hangs over a cliff. The man placed the TV in the back room on the floor. There was a weak spot on the floor and when the fattest homeless person walked over the floor, the floor broke which was a HUGE inconvenience because he TV and the fat man fell through the floor and over the cliff, luckily the TV was plugged in so it was hanging by the cord but an old lady with Alzheimer's forgot that there was a hole in the floor and unplugged the TV so she could clean the switches. In the end the TV fell off the cliff.

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what you say to the kid that just hit puberty? your a young man

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a man walked in to a bar and said 'outch'

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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