What does a carrot and a potato have in common? They're both not chocolate

What does a horse and a donkey have in common? They are both very different from trees

What did the fat kid eat for dinner? Salad, he's on a diet.

knock knock who's there? to to who? to whom*

I like my coffee how I like my women. Without a penis. - Blake Woodman

Why do Asian Women have small boobs? Because anything under A is unacceptable.

Whats pink and fluffy? Pink fluff

-how many potatoes are in a sack -5

Q: How do you stop a baby from crying? A: You hit it with brick.

So I was blow drying my penis and my girlfriend asked what I was doing. Apparently, "heating up your dinner." wasn't the right response.

I used to be an adventurer like you, Then I settled down in a quiet place in the woods with a girl and raised a family.

What'd the left nut say to the right nut? How's it hangin?

What is the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? One is fun to hit with a sledgehammer while the other is just a water melon.

Billy was curious if gasoline burns, so he decided to...... .... O crap I'm late for Billy's funeral.

Q: what's better than ice cream A: not having aids

What do you call somebody pimping out their bitches for very large amounts of money???? A dog breeder.

A man walks into a bar. He walks out again remembering he forgot his wallet.

Why didn't Jimmy ever get his butt of the couch? His butt was nailed to it and he was also dead. Why didn't his parents save him? they died before he did.

What's big, an instrument, has black and white keys, and is located in the bathroom? I don't know. A piano. But why in the bathroom? Don't tell me how to furnish my house.

What do you get when you cross a surfer and a black man? An angry surfer and an angry black man. You really should be nicer to people.

Whats better then winning a gold medal at the special olympics????? NOT BEING RETARDED!!!!!!!

Yo mama's so fat, she has low self-esteem.

Sarah Palin

Why did the wife scream when she saw her husband? Because he was dead

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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