a retard walks into a bar a bruise appeared on his head

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What has eight wheels and cost more than a Lamborghini? Two Lamborghinis.

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knock knock who's their panda panda who shut up I never said yo name and don't call me black

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What happened to the orphan when it walked to the park? He found his birth parents........but then they were killed by a crazy hobo and he was taken away and molested

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hi

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A man walks into a bar carrying a piece of asphalt under his arm. The bartender says, "We don't serve construction workers here."

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Mom: Ask me if you're adopted Boy: Am I adopted? Mom: yes

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Most of these Anti-Jokes are Anti-Anti jokes, which makes them funny, if they were actually Anti-Jokes they wouldn't be funny at all.

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A black man, an Asian man, and a Mexican man jump off a bridge. They were all suffering from chronic depression and couldn't take the pressures of life anymore.

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A dog walks into the local newspaper to place an ad. The dog writes; "woof woof, woof woof woof." Receptionist: You know you can ad another two woofs for the same price? Dog: Well that wouldn't make any sense at all?

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what is the color of a burp burple

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Guy 1: why are you being such a douche? Guy 2: cause douches get the most pussy

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Why is Taylor sad? Because she's the middle of a human centipede.

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What did the pear say to the apple? Fred, you delusions are getting worse and i'm getting a divorce.

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Whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? Jews undergo metabolism, maintain homeostasis, possess a capacity to grow, respond to stimuli, reproduce and, through natural selection, adapt to their environment in successive generations. More complex living organisms can communicate through various means.[1][5] A diverse array of living organisms (life forms) can be found in the biosphere on Earth, and the properties common to these organisms—plants, animals, fungi, protists, archaea, and bacteria—are a carbon- and water-based cellular form with complex organization and heritable genetic information. Pizza does not.

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Like this joke, bitch.

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Bob: Hey Jim, what's up? Jim: Obviously the sky, oh and i see a few planes too. by the way why are you asking me why don't you just look up?

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Q. What's worse than 9/11? A. That one shark jumping episode of Happy Days.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a room? This is impossible as dead babies are incapable of achieving such a feat.

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I'm gonna say something that is going to blow you(away). My Rape Dungeon has carpet.

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What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gangrape.

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knock knock whos there johovas witness O-0

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What do a grape and an elephant have in common? They're both purple, except for the elephant.

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If Johnny has 5 apples and Susie has 7 apples, will they give them to the homeless?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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