What did the Fish say to the other Fish? Nothing, fish cant talk.

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What happens if a girl punches a guy? A white man in prison, convicted of sexual assault.

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who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Osama Bin Laden

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How many times can the Frenchman cheat on his wife? I don't know.

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A man walks into a sporting goods store and pulls out a gun. Then he returns it and leaves.

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What happened to the deaf, dumb, and blind kid? I don't know. Niether does he.

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Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red paint

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What did the cow say to the chicken? Moo. Moral: Cuckoo!

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-hey sam look what mom gave me for christmas -what eli? -a new baseball bat -thats your prosthetic leg silly

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse answers, "Because I'm an alcoholic."

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Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because she is blind.

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Q: What's your dog's name ? A: Dog. Q: What's your cat's name ? A: Cat. Q: What's your dick's name A: Pinky

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you are getting chased by a lion, a tiger, and a zebra. What do you do???? Get off the Merry-go-round.

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you wanna hear a good anti joke?, so do i

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Always put punctuation at the end of your sentence

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A.Because that's where it wanted to go.

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What's funnier than a dead baby? An episode of 'Friends'.

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What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

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So a man walks into a bar… and gets a bad bruise and a big bump.

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Sometimes an alligator will bring you apples. Sometimes it won't.

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What did one socially awkward kid say to another socially awkward kid? Nothing

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Why did the grandmother lock her grandson in the closet? Because she didn't love him.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Our experimental treatment for Anterograde amnesia has failed. I will inform your family.

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A:Knock knock B:Who´s there? A:Beat B:Beat who? A:Beat your ass if you don´t open that door!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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