While teaching her second grade class, Mrs. Peets asks the class a question from last night's homework, "OK class, what did you get for number five, 5+12=?" A kid in the back raises his hand slowly. "Yes James?", said the teacher. The kid in the back says, "My dick is as hard as a rock, Mrs. Peets."

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Did you here about the guy who got his right leg and right arm cut off? I made him up but he would make one good anti-joke.

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what's the difference between a dead baby and a lamborghini? I don't have a lamborghini in my garage!

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What do you call a cow with no legs? A leg-less cow

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What is black and looks like a person A black person

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Two birds fly onto a bench. They cherp 3 times and sit there enjoying the nice weather.

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Liverpool City Football Club

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what do u get when you cross a monkey, a sock and wheels? A: a sock monkey. I was kidding about the wheels

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42, that is all

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If you are stranded on a deserted island would you eat your hand or the 5 star meal you butter prepared? -Matt

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Have you heard of the lawnmower joke? (NO) Neither have I!

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Nickleback.

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Michel Moor on a die...

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Roses are red Violets are blue This poem is random Microwave

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If a man is alone in the woods and there is no one there to tell he's wrong is he right? If a tree falls on a women.... Before we tell the rest why was there a tree I the kitchen?

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What bird can lift the most? i do not know, I suggest asking an Ornithologist

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How can a chicken be dirty? It can be covered in dirt!

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There were 3 women, a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. They were driving with a gorilla when suddenly the car crashed. All the women died but only the gorilla survived. The police investigated with the gorilla and did some simple sign language. The police, using hand motions, asked the gorilla what each individual female was doing before the car crashed. The gorilla ran away for reasons unknown.

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Three men walk into a bar. They order drinks. This joke isn't funny.

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how many blondes did it take to fix a nuclear reactor? 1 she was a black japanese rapist

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Send "What Makes You Beautiful" Ringtone to your CellShowHideSong Notes - Go behind the words! You're insecure, don't know what for You're turning heads when you walk through the do-o-or Don't need make-up - to cover up Being the way that you are is eno-o-ough Everyone else in the room can see it Everyone else but you Baby you light up my world like nobody else The way that you flip your hair gets me overwhelmed the way you smile at the ground, it ain't hard to tell You don't know Oh oh You don't know you're beautiful! If only you saw what I could see you'd understand why I want you so desperatley Right now I'm looking at you and I can't believe You don't know Oh oh You don't know you're beautiful! Read more: ONE DIRECTION - WHAT MAKES YOU BEAUTIFUL LYRICS http://www.metrolyrics.com/what-makes-you-beautiful-lyrics-one-direction.html#ixzz1sJdk3KHD Copied from MetroLyrics.com

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antonio is ssooo shexy and smokes

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Knock knock Who's there? Brittney Spears Brittney Spears who? Knock Knock Who's there? Opps I did it again.

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What is long and black? The line at KFC

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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