Dear Sarah, My name is Jesse, and I am severely overweight. BOUNCE ON MY DICK LIKE TYGA BITCH, Your lover, Jesse.

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What do you get when you mix C4 with a lit- KABOOM!!!

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Robocop and T-800 argue over who can run the fastest, Robocop claims he is the fastest, while T-800 says that he is the fastest. To settle things once and for all, they start a race. At first T-800 seems to be leading Then the T-800 is leading by a great distance. moments later the T-800 has a huge lead. But then suddenly, without any warning, the race shifts! T-800 is now leading only by a great distance! Yet in a amazing, and completely unexpected plot-twist. T-800 wins! Moral: :O

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their is a box of mystery. wat is in that box?? do u no wat is in that box!?!?!?!?!?!?

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You Obviously Lack Originiality YOLO.

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Why wasn't the old woman sitting on the porch? Because she got raped by a big scorpian.

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why did the guy make a deer and and bear mix because he wanted some beer

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knock knock Who's there? The repo man Why? You're being evicted

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What do you call a man with no arms and legs, lying outside of your house? An ambulance, he's clearly in trouble.

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What is pretty, has big tits, talks like a guy, and has a dick? Your mom giving me a handjob.

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What did the elephant say to the other elephant? We're both elephants!

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Why does a Jew, a catholic, and a buddhist eat pizza? because they like the way it tastes.

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The family performs an array of disgusting sexual acts. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "It has no name."

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Why did the 14 year old girl have sex? Because she's in love with her boyfriend and that's how she expresses it.

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I began as a dreamer, then I became a visionary, then I saw my dream come true, until it shattered us all. Do you believe that perhaps, there are people out there, trying to stop the world from reaching a better age?

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two cannables walk in to McDonalds

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What do you call a 46 year old man with one eye 4'5 and has one arm coming out of his chest Steve

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Why was the chicken afaid to cross the road? because there was no road.

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Priest: "Matt, will you take Senae to be your wife, your partner in life and your one true love? Will you cherish her friendship and love her today, tomorrow and forever? Will you trust and honor her, laugh with her and cry with her? Will you be faithful through good times and bad, in sickness and in health as long as you both shall live?" Matt: No

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A man and a woman are in a bar. The man says, "Excuse me miss, but you're very attractive, may I please buy you a drink?" to which the woman replies, "Thank you very much, but I'm afraid I've never been to Mexico."

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How do you stop the baby from touching the stove? Cut of its arms.

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what's black, white, and red all over? a penguin stuck in a blending machine

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BF:Roses r red Violets r blue a face like ur's shuld b i n the zoo but dont worry i'll be there but not in the cage but laughing at u. GF:Wanna c a magic trick? POOF ur single

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Q: whats funnier than watching a black man and a midget fight? A: anything technically, your opinion

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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