What did the blonde get for Christmas? A Brain

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do,Nt loagh at me I has dislecqsia

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What do black people and apples have in common? Nothing.

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"What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby" "One's fun to hit with a bat and the other One's a watermelon.

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4 Jews are killed during a car accident, the whole city mourns over there death and create a plaque in their honor.

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Ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

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What did the astronaut say at AA? Alcohol is ruining my life.

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Roses are red Violets are blue There are other flowers in the world But you wouldn't know it from this poem.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A bug in your nut.

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What's black and has a beary taste? A black bear.

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Bumsniffer

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Two babies wonder off from their home. They die of starvation because there parents could not find them in time.

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What walks on four in the morning, three at noon, and two at night? A baby with leprosy.

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If you don't see banners here, it doesn't mean they are not there...

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What do you call a zebra without stripes? A stripeless zebra.

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What is the difference between a priest and a nun? Cant you see the nun is dead you insensitive bastard!

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? not finding a worm in your apple, i quite like them actualy

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A rabbit crosses a road... To be continued

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A man with Tourette's syndrome walks into a bar. Because of his disease, he shouts unexpected profanities across the room, and everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the humiliation anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom, pulls out a gun, and points it at his head. His wife walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and he notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to make. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. Shocked and afraid, he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentenced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man still suffers from Tourette's and cannot control his ticks and rots in jail. He continues to scream random obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

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How do you kill an elephant? -With a gun? No, an elephant gun. How do you kill a red elephant? -With an elephant gun? No, with a red elephant gun. How do you kill a blue elephant? -WIth a blue elephant gun? No, you choke it until it turns blue and kill it with a red elephant gun. How do you kill a purple elephant? Theres no such thing as a purple elephant, thus contradicting the reality of performing a major act of animal abuse on it.

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What is a life without options.... an optionless life

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How Many Blondes does it take to open a fridge. 1 Because most blondes are smart and can open fridges.

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a jew, a latino and an aboriginal walk into a bar this is an example of a great inter-racial comunity

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CRY

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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