Why was the baby going so fast? It was tied to a bus.

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What's brown and sticky? a stick

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roses are red Jacob's a Jew the holocaust was funny Haha f**k you

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???????????? WTF?

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What do you call a man covered in magnets? Attractive

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A man took his son out to play catch. The boy didn't even try to catch the ball. After that the man took his son to the amusement park to have fun. The boy didn't even try to have fun. Then the man took his son to the burger place nearby. Once again the son didn't even touch his food. Finally the man lost his temper and beat his seemingly ungrateful son and cried over the fact that his son was mentally retarded.

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Why did Billy cry? He had Pubic Lice

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How's a raven like a writing desk. you really are alice.

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I hate it when i don't forward an email and then i die the next day.

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a shed? A: Considering babies are incapable of rational thought it is unlikely they would understand how to employ the correct method to paint.

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Your mother is so ugly that when she looks in the mirror she feels bad about her appearance.

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Knock Knock Who's there? A package, the UPS man is already back in his truck.

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pigs are sometimes pink GOSH

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What's 7+7? 14 you dumbass

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What's the longest, hardest thing on a black man? His femur.

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Why didn't Hitler drink whiskey? Because it made him mean.

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Why doesn't Santa come in the summer? Because it's not Christmas.

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Why does Mike Tyson always win his fights? Because he hides in a refridgerator

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An American guy, Chinese guy, and Black guy are on a boat. Who jumps off first? Hopefully no one jumps off, especially because the ocean current is strong. They should call the coast guard if they are lost and find a safe way back to shore.

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How do you make a baby cry? Break its legs.

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What is green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

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HEY are you aware of how tired your suitcase is? Sorry, I rest my case.

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How can you tell when a lawyer is lying? In most people who lie eyebrows may raise, eyes may widen and gaze may alter, anal sphincter usually tightens, breathing often quickens marginally, external body temperature alters and sweat (and therefore skin electrical conductivity) increases.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I am colourblind so screw you!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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