A blonde tries to kill herself cutting both her wrists.Why didn't it work? Because her boyfriend found her just in time and managed to stop the bleeding and took her to the hospital. After some years of therapy they got married and lived happy together for the rest of their lifes.

Hey you want to here a joke? I can't think of one

What do you call a car that is green? A Green Car.

When is homework not homework? When it is turned into the teacher.

How many eco-friendly people does it take to change a lightbulb? Nobody knows because fluorescent lightbulbs last 6 to 12 years longer than an incandescent lightbulb.

What will you be doing right before you die? ... ... living.

what did the cow said to the other cow? Moo

Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because he was too much of a bitch to when his friends dared him.

What do a duck and a bike have in common? They both have handle bars except for the duck

How did the ship-less pirate cross the Atlantic? In an airplane.

whats purple with fur?nothing mammals cannot have purple fur

How many chickens does it take to screw in a light bulb? Any number of chickens plus one person.

if japanese cars are called riceburners would german cars be called jewburners

Q: Whats better than 10 baby's nailed to 1 tree. A: 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

wats worse than gettin bitched at by ur mom? gettin raped by a giant scorpian n getting SUPER ULTRA MEGA AIDS

Why did the Mxican eat the taco? Because he was hungry,

What does Megatron say when a video game takes forever to load? "You have failed me yet again, Start Screen!"

Knock Knock. KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK. ANYBODY HOME?

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Shes been dead for some time now.

A Pole walks into a bar and gets annexed by Germany.

why did the chicken cros the road? Becuase the all the cars were stopped at the near by red light.

What's yellow and can not swim? A Bulldozer

iff god whas funny why thit he let your mother be raped and your sister murdered en iff satan whos a ice cream will he taste sweet ?

Why couldn't the man find his watch? Because he was mugged by a homeless man and had severe brain damage..... ....and because he left it at the office

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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