Roses are red Violets are blue I am not using commas That is improper punctuation.

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i like serious. serious means business. business means cash. cash means money. money makes me happy and when i'm happy you dont die

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Why were there only 5,000 Mexicans at the Battle of Alamo? They only had 1250 trucks.

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Why was Hitler a bad person? He killed himself.

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whats worse then 9/11? -George W. Bush

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Why did the bartender tell the black man to "Get Out"? It was 4 a.m and the bar closed at 3:30 a.m an honest mistake by the man.

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*Tell your listener to say knock knock* B: Knock knock A: Who's there? B: *awkward silence

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A man walks into a barn the n was not visible

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Why was the lady fat. She ate a lot of food.

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An American guy, Chinese guy, and Black guy are on a boat. Who jumps off first? Hopefully no one jumps off, especially because the ocean current is strong. They should call the coast guard if they are lost and find a safe way back to shore.

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a man walks into a bar, his alcoholism is slowly destroying his family

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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who has brown eyes blonde hair and red lips a human-being

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I asked a Jewish girl for her number. she rolled up her sleeve.

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How do you spell dog? C-A-T!

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A blonde tries to kill herself cutting both her wrists.Why didn't it work? Because her boyfriend found her just in time and managed to stop the bleeding and took her to the hospital. After some years of therapy they got married and lived happy together for the rest of their lifes.

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Why did the black man kill himself? Because he was black

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Why are asians so smart? Because they study very hard and learn the material.

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What's the difference between a Muslim and a box? A box won't blow you up!

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How do you starve a Mexican? Deny him Food Stamps.

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Why did a blind man buy a violin. To learn how to play a violin.

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How the hell did Susie get on the swing anyway I don't know you tell me?

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A man runs into a bar, he is in a coma for 7 years and most likely going to die, of severe brain damage.

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knock knock GO AWAY I'M IN THE SHOWER

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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