Knock Knock. KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK. ANYBODY HOME?

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Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

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How come the black man couldn't be seen on film? He could be seen on film, he's not a vampire.

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Well, honestly I don't know how I feel about meeting you yet, or chatting with you, I never believed I would get to speak, or even less meet "The Nero", I mean as far as I know, nobody that ever worked alongside you ever has... ...By the way, the thing with the metal arm, well I don't have both arms, so yeah, story of my life. I am "Eliza" here too, its not coding, its just me sharing my real part of my life with our followers, and well, they do not make much sense out of it, but I get to share the tale about how Nero saved me, if not in person.

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Grammar ... the difference between knowing your shit, and knowing you're shit.

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A priest, a rabbi, and a Buddhist monk walk into a bar. They discuss their differences over a pint of beer and leave with a greater understanding of each other's faiths.

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What's yellow and can not swim? A Bulldozer

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whats worse than Brussels sprouts brussels sprouts that has petite vegetation, lack of sun causing mold and placed in a septic tank.

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What did the clerk say and do when he was givng out free food What he did:Gave them What he said:"If you want to get this free, pay $5.00"

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HEY are you aware of how tired your suitcase is? Sorry, I rest my case.

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Q: What did your mom say to your dad? A: Honey i want a divorce.

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How many polish people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? -One

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Why is the kid over-weighted? Because he had to many calories in his diegestive system and he couldn't burn the calories

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She didn't have arms.

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Why did the Mxican eat the taco? Because he was hungry,

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Who gave Max head georgia Hidi

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How many Jews died in the Holocaust? Not enough.

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Your mother is so ugly that when she looks in the mirror she feels bad about her appearance.

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What do a duck and a bike have in common? They both have handle bars except for the duck

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Justin Bieber

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How many chickens does it take to screw in a light bulb? Any number of chickens plus one person.

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What did Sarah Palin say as she gazed to the West? "I really wish my daughter hadn't gotten pregnant."

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Why does Mike Tyson always win his fights? Because he hides in a refridgerator

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I asked a Jewish girl for her number. she rolled up her sleeve.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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