While teaching her second grade class, Mrs. Peets asks the class a question from last night's homework, "OK class, what did you get for number five, 5+12=?" A kid in the back raises his hand slowly. "Yes James?", said the teacher. The kid in the back says, "My dick is as hard as a rock, Mrs. Peets."

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Did you here about the guy who got his right leg and right arm cut off? I made him up but he would make one good anti-joke.

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Statistically 9/11 Americans wont get this joke. But 7/7 British will.

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Yeah, it makes sense if you think about it, I changed my alias back and forth from Axel Knight, to Axel White, first because Axel White sounded not only as a opposite to Nero, but also because it sounded like something a Nazi leader would call himself, we went renegade and used that in order to draw in and bust a lot of Neo Nazi`s with enough money and bad intentions to make bad stuff happen. But thats another story, I heard about an Axel Knight partaking in Point Zero, had I known you where the leader (I hope you are being honest friend) I would have warned you much sooner, but there was no way for me to know if you where working together... Since you literally where.

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What do you call an Arab flying a plane? A pilot.

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Unconventional thinking Something else out of one: So sometimes I feel there is something I want right? But I don't feel like I deserve it yet or i hesitate although I fucking want it So I go home, decide to take my time before I decide to buy it, and sit my ass on a chair covered with spikes until I decide it is time to get it, Moral 1: You want to take the better decision but don't feel time is right? Some spikes up your ass is not only the perfect way to change your mind, but in this case an excellent metaphor to why you want to keep doing whats best for you. Moral best: Think if you could get all that time you spent hesitating back, would that not be awesome? What if you just stop hesitating now? Would that not be aweso... Go fuckyourself... Nerometal Fuck Neronism... Cool name though

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what happens when a white guy goes to harlem he gets robbed by 5 to 10 black men

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When Santa got stuck up the chimney he began to shout.. But he didn't shout for long as he soon succumbed to the toxic smoke and died of carbon monoxide poisoning

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I threw it after I chopped its' head off.

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Whats cooler than being cool in High School? Nothing, now take a hit...everyone's looking

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Roses are red, Violets are blue I suck at poetry, Show me your tits

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What do you call a penguin in the desert? A penguin.

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Friends are like potatoes - when you eat them they die.

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What did the little boy become for Halloween? An orphan, his parents were killed that day.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being molested by a giant octopus.

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What do you call a cow with no legs? A leg-less cow

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What has a head but can't see? A penis.

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Roses are red violets are blue I am in 301 Club and so are you.

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What's red,little and its in the corner??? --- Strawberry in the corner

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You Obviously Lack Originiality YOLO.

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Which brains do zombie like most? Zombies dont exist.

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What's under the first mate? The second mate.

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Michel Moor on a die...

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Roses are red Violets are blue This poem is random Microwave

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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