What do a book and a tractor have in common? Both are for driving, except the book.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Everything I did, Was just a mistake like you.

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Q: What is the difference between Jimmy and a kite A: Jimmy is higher MR

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Why did the chicken loom the road? To unlock the final boss.

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What did Batman say to Superman? Nothing, he killed him with a kryptonite spear.

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Why did the black man cross the road? To show the chicken that it isn't that hard.

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how many toyota's does it take to pee on a soccer game 900 because isis is a cat vagina

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Knock knock. ... ... *after waiting 30 seconds or so to no answer, the knocker concludes there is no one home and decides to go home to take his son to soccer practice and work on his taxes, and maybe call his mother to see how her foot surgery went* Who's there? Oh.. This is awkward, I forgot why I was here in the first place. I have to go. Bye.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Interrupting Cow. Interrupting Cow who? Interrupting Cow who, unlike his quiet friends back on the farm, enjoys to speak when others are nearly finished with their sentence.

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Yo mama's so fat because she has a glandular disorder that makes her fat.

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What's worse than accidentally flooding your bathroom? A Tsunami

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When life throws you knives, you're probably dead

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Roses are red. Violets are blue... Hold on. Roses could be white too.

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what do you call a girl with no arms and legs whatever her name is

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What do you get when you put a frog in a paper shredder? Harshly punished by the Animal Humane Society

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Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was pursuing his dream of becoming the world's best circus clown, which six developed a fear of in a tragic circus accident which occured in his childhood. Therefore, six was afraid of seven.

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An anorexic women walks into McDonalds

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How do you get your clock to stop ticking? Hit it with a sledge hammer.

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Whats great about F***ing twenty one year olds? There's twenty of them.

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What starts with F and ends in U C K? firetruck What starts with P and ends in O R N? popcorn What only costs 5 cents on weekends? your mom

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Why did the girl get her hair cut off? Because she had cancer

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Whatever you do in life, give 100%… unless you’re giving blood.

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Why the chimp fell off the tree? Because it's dead.

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What is chewy and tastes like gum? Chewing gum.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops