A man claims to own a talking dog. A skeptic approaches the man and his dog and asks for a demonstration. The man asks his dog, "How does sandpaper feel?" The dog says, "Ruff!" The skeptic is not convinced. The man then asks his dog, "Who is the greatest baseball player of all time?" The dog, who like all dogs cannot fully comprehend human speech, proceeds to lick his balls.

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Superman, Batman and Spiderman are all in a race. Who wins? Grow up. Superheros aren't real.

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ok guys finish this joke: Im the biggest fag-got because_____________.

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What did Mars say to warn Prehistoric Earth before an asteroid hit it? Nothing, sound can't travel through space, it's a vacuum. The dinosaurs will be missed.

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Where is one place everyone eventually goes to rest? A cemetery.

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A man walks into a bar... The steal bar hurt his face and had to get stitches.

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whats blue, saggy, moldy and smelly? Will Nealis' Vagina

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69

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What did Osama Bin Laden say before was captured? nothing the U.S. military slit his throat on site

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Child: Hey mom can i go to the store with you? Mom: no son, i'm not really going to the store. I'm cheating on your father.

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What did the jobless man get for Christmas? Fired...

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What is a mean thing to say to Stephen Hawking? Please take a seat.

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Why did the girl lose her appetite She was stabbed repeatedly with a switch blade.

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Roses are black, Violets are black, I am blind.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender says "why the long face?" He says, "I have acromegaly"

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How do you teach an old dog a new trick? Answer: You can't

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Why couldn't little Jeffy find his way to gumdrop palace? Because he was shot

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Q: What kind of bees make milk? A: None. Bees make honey, not milk.

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A man walks into the bar and asks the bartender, "Are you smelling me right now?"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I can't really remember the reason, it was about 5 years ago and a lot of things have happened since.

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Q: How do you get an elephant in a refrigerator in three easy steps? A: You open the refrigerator door, you put the elephant inside, you close the refrigerator door. Q": How do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator in four easy steps? A": You open the refrigerator door, you take the elephant out, you put the giraffe inside, you close the refrigerator door.

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A horse walks into a bar. He was blind.

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HOLY SHIT BITCH!!!

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what do you call a blonde with black hair? Artificial intelligence

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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