What do you call a gay scientologist? His first name or last name, depending on how close you 2 are.

Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere.

Q: What's the difference between a plum and a rabbit? A: They're both purple, except for the rabbit

what do you call a man who is addicted to alcohol... an alcoholic

Why don't you push a mexican off a bike, because its probably yours,

1 + 1 ? Hmm, I don't know, maybe 2 but I could be wrong.

Q: How do you fit two beluga whales into a mini van? A: You don't.

Why did the little boy die? He had cancer.

How do you get a cat off a swing? You throw a dog at it.

Why did I kill the Muslim because I'm smart

banana

why was 6 afraid of seven? cause 7's a n i g g a

Why did the girl fall off of her swing? Because she had no arms.

what did the boy say when his friend was having a panic attack? "don't panic!" rather earnestly in the hope that his friend's breathing returned to normal as panic attacks can be very uncomfortable and place too great a strain upon the cardio and respiratory functions.

Did you hear the one about the spoon and the dis running away while the cow jumped over the moon, IMPOSSIBLE! eating material such as the spoon and dish are inanimate objects, and cows cant jump for they weigh from 600 to 1000 lbs.

every knight i see an owl at window

Two people are walking down the street, unaware of the highly polluted environment and that they could save a life.

What do you call a black baby? A nigglet

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Anti-jokes

I take the "the" out of Psychotherapist

A kid wanted to change the channel... One thing leads to another.

Stephen Hawkins walks into a bar...

what do you get when you see jonny cry-a monkey lol

What did your mom say after she went sky diving? Nothing, her parachute didn't open

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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