How do you make a momma bird not fly back to its nest? Burn it down!!

thumb_up thumb_down -44

People with cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -46

Why did Billy fail his math quiz? Because he's stupid.

thumb_up thumb_down -46

What's worse than finding a bug in your soup? The Holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down -46

Why Stevie is silent nowdays? Because he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -54

Person 1: today my doctor said I'm dyslexic Person 2: oh yeah? Are you ahdd too?

thumb_up thumb_down -56

Your mom is so ugly that she was mercilessly bullied throughout high school which led to severe depression and low self-esteem, however she went to college, got a career, found a man who loved her for who she is, not how she looks, and raised a family happily ever after.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

Why did the chicken cross the road? An even better question is why are the chicken morals being questioned every time it feels like doing something.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Why was Little Billy sad? Because he got shot.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

"Hey want to hear the best knock-knock joke ever." "Sure." "Ok you start." "Knock-knock." "Whos there?" "..........."

thumb_up thumb_down +39

A baby seal walks into a club.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had a gun to its head

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Knock Knock. Come in.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

A blindman walks into a bar... then a chair, then a pole

thumb_up thumb_down +37

I saw a sign saying Falling Rocks. But no, no it doesn't.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Justin Bieber walks out of a closet.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

You know why the economy is so bad? Years of giving into corporations instead of local business. This moves the profits to the owner of the company instead of mom and pop who will be giving it back to the local community.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What's do a woman's vagina and a camel's toe have in common? Other than being parts of two mammals, they have nothing in common.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What do you call a group that has a microphone, a bass, two guitars and a drum kit? A Band

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why was the orange so serious? He was trying to concentrate.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What is a dogs favorite color? Gray due to the fact that they cant see any other color

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Q: How did the Irishman die? A: He was old.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What did the red cat say to his owner? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops