A grasshopper hops into a bar. The bartender looks down at him and says "Hey, we have a drink named after you." the grasshopper looks up at the bartender...then proceeds to hop along because Grasshoppers can't communicate with humans. Then several of the bars patrons looked at the bartender, worried for his mental health.

what's funnier than hell? heaven

watch a i d s left

Why did the chicken cross the road? To pick up the carcass of its road-killed younger brother and weep.

*Knock knock* Who's there? No one answers so the man opens the door and gets stabbed 7 times in the chest

How do you confuse a conspiracy theorist? Tell them the government is not real.

Who's Italian and plays with a peach? Mario

How did the prisoner escape from prison? He asked to leave.

You just read this ..

why was 6 afraid of 7? because he raped her

Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

boobs.

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

You come home and find your family dead. What do you do? Take a picture, post it on facebook

What do you call two men kissing? Gay.

Roses are red. Violets are black. Why is ur chest as flat as ur back?

How do you wake up a black man? Punch him in the face.

Three men went into a bar; one was blind, another deaf and the third was mute. The blind guy said "Did you SEE that?" The deaf guy said "WHAT?" And the mute said "...."

I spilled spot remover on my dog, now hes gone.

Your moms so old. She might die soon

Why did the man start a shooting spree at walmart? Because he is mentally unstable and people at walmart make easy targets.

How do you kill Chuck Norris. Shoot him in the face

What us black and white and read all over The newspaper

Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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