Tip for Employers: Avoid hiring unlucky people by immediately tossing half the resumes into the bin.

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So 2 apples are having sex, and one apple sais to the other, I got worms.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, my eyes are bleeding

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if it walks like a duck and looks like a duck your probably looking at a goose

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? I dont know so why are you asking?

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So a baby seal walks into a club

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Knock knock Who's there No one We are all on the computer

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"My c.ock is bigger!" "No! My c.ock is bigger!": Two gamec.ock owners arguing over who has a bigger dick.

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Why did the boy die? He had cancer.

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what do you get when you cross a giraffe and an octopus an abomination

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What's utter destruction but still has wheels? A car that was crushed at a junk yard, after the Bridgestone tires were removed for another car that could still use them

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Why did Juan cross the border into America? To provide a better opportunity for him and his family.

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I'm Donald Trump! Wump wump wump! Win a few Lose a few I'm Donald Trump!

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Ahhh! Grandpa your going too hard!

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Why doesn't Stephen Hawking play football? Because he's a nerd.

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a mexecan guy walks in a bar he ask how much is a beer.its $400 and 55'.WHAT THATS SUCKSISH.no i just like to joke its 1 dollor.oh.....shut up go walk in a bra!!!!

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I was at work today and whilst staring at my beautiful colleague I realised how hard it had got. So I quit

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What did one manicotti say to the other manicotti? I doubt we'll ever know.

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An insane individual walks into a bank and asks for $500. The teller refuses since he doesn't have an account, so the individual pulls out a gun and asks the teller again. The teller presses the silent panic button, causing the cops to show up and arrest the gunman, but not before he manages to shoot the teller and the small child standing next two counters over.

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Mario goes home after a hard day of work and finds his entire family killed and a note from Bowser... He is now an asshole who beats and rapes kids...

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whats the difference between a mexican and a fish? one is a human being while the other is a fish, what did you expect?

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Are you related to Yoda? because yoda-licious!!!!

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Your future.

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Why did Lucy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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