Why can't you give a diabetic a cookie? Due to the lack of Insulin produced in the Pancreas, the sudden spike of sugar into the blood stream may send the person into a diabetic coma, which good possibly result in the amputation of a limb.

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Why did Mary fall off the swing. She had no arms Knock knock Whis there Not Mary.

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im watching you..

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What did the devout Catholic man say to his gay neighbours who just got married? "Congratulations!"

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A man makes a sandwich.

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What's white and sticky? A white stick.

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There are two muffins in the oven. One says: "It's really getting hot in here!" The other one can't reply because it is already dead.

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what do you call an exited rectangle? an Erectangle

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Vagina jokes aren't funny. Period. Damnit, ignore that.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he.

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Did you see Stevie Wonder's new car? ....neither did he.

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Two carnivorous dinosaurs get into a fight. Carnage ensues and many baby dinosaur eggs are stomped on, and in the end they both die.

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1: Knock knock. 2: Who's there? 1: Boo. 2: Please do come on in Boo, its so lovely to see you!

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what gets louder as it get smaller? a baby in a blender

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What do you call a dead baby who died by getting ran over by a car? Jimmy

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Why did Lucy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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What did the husband say when his wife startled him as she appeared coming out of the kitchen? You scared me.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being chased by Osama.

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What do you call 4 black men in a BMW? Successful Businessmen.

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why did the old lady come home late? she got raped.

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Yanter, Look it up

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your mother

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The horses name was Friday.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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