Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Not because she had no arms, but because she just had no hands.

So a dog walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "Quickly, someone give me the number for animal control."

Why can't Johnny run? He has no legs.

i am iron man running over fat kids in my van

Whats better than winning gold at the special olympics? Not being retarded.

A homeless man walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender says it'll be $4.50. The homeless man doesn't have any money so he leaves.

Why do fishermen wear red suspenders? To keep their pants up.

knock knock who's there? dave dave who? dave suddenly burst into tears as his grandmothers altzimers became so serious she forgot his name

What's worse than Jedward? Nothing. They are really and truly awful.

Whats the difference between a prostitute and crack dealer? One sells addicting drugs, while the other exploits her vagina for money. Either way, they're both illegal.

What did the white guy tell the black guy? You are my equal and, as such, are entitled to the same things I am.

Three peasants were brought in front of the King to be rewarded for their assistance during a drought. The King told them that they could each request one thing from him that he could provide. The first man asked to be rich, so the King ordered his guards to fetch a large sack that was filled to the brim with gems and gold pieces. The man thanked the King and left his palace joyfully. The second man asked for a larger house so the King gave him access to one of his many castles. He hurriedly left, eager to try out his new home for size. The third man asked for a cat so the King gave him a cat.

What did pinocchio want to become? Hepatitus free.

why did the chicken cross the road? I dont know, you ask it.

3 bears walk into a market. A little girl sneaks into their house. Meanwhile, people are freaking out because there are THREE BEARS in the market.

What was the pirate movie rated? Pg-13

What's green and apple-y? You're gay.

Question: How did the little girl die Answer: cancer and AIDS

What did the cat say to the dog? - meow!

A Priest and a young child walk into a dark alley.... It leads to a church and he talks to the young boy about God

How do black men eat chicken? Chicken goes in bone come out.

Why did the black lady pick out a white dress? Because she thought it was a pretty white dress.

What do you call a fly without wings? Injured and left for dead.

What happened to your hamster? It died.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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