Why do elephants have such big ears? So they can hear really well.

Why did the young man not want to go to school? Because he had a large tumor on the left side of his face.

What's brown and sticky? A stick

Knock knock Who's there? Jesus Jesus who? Jesus Christ, your lord and savior.

What did the mexican fireman call his twin sons? nothing. they were stillborn

A man decided to enter the local pun contest. He sent in ten puns. One of them was very witty and he won the contest and felt very good about himself.

Women's Rights

What happened when Sally got hit by a truck? WHO CARES CALL 911!!!!

JUST KIDDING^

"It's A Bird!!!" "It's A Plane!!!" "No, It's not either of those things."

why did a girl walk down the alley? because her name was alley!

What do you call a blonde who tries to swim on land? - Stupid.

What did the drug addict say to the doctor? I am a drug addict and am in need of help and rehabilitation.

A duck walks passed a lemonade stand.

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side

Two blondes walk into a building......you'd think at least one of them would have seen it.

Spoiling your fun. Jesus said on the cross, I shall return. Then he returned three days later to say goodbye to his people. Moral: What the fuck are you Åsshats waiting for? The third coming?

What did the boy to it's grandad........ UR COuSIN¬

Why did the boy throw his clock out the window? After hours of waiting for the perfect victim, the boy spotted an elderly woman walking down the sidewalk. The clock barreled through the air, hitting the old woman on the head at extremely high speeds. She was immediately killed on contact.

What is a homeless man for Halloween? A garbage bag

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know why the fuck he crossed the road, I don't know what he is thinking.

Did you hear about the blind carpenter who picked up his hammer and saw? Did you hear about the deaf shepherd who gathered his flock and heard (herd)? If you don't understand these, use your dictionary and look up the words "blind," "deaf," "saw," "heard" and "herd." http://gpsphone-tracker.com/

UP

What eats grass and goes MMMMOOOOOOO? A weird person that likes to eat grass and MMMMOOOOOOO

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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