Q: why can't dinosaurs sing? A: because they're dead!!!

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A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

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A padawan walks into a bar. He is promptly ridiculed by his master for not minding his surroundings.

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Q: How do you get a clown to stop smiling? A: Hit it with an axe

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Yo mama so fat she sells shade. Yo mama so fat she needs cheat codes for wii fit. Yo mama so fat she in call of duty when a player kills her they get a 5 person kill streak. Yo mama so fat that she is fat. :)

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Where is my tractor?

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What's the longest, hardest thing on a black man? His femur.

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What's green and fluffy? Red fluff, if you're color blind.

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How do you make a baby cry? Break its legs.

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whats worse than Brussels sprouts brussels sprouts that has petite vegetation, lack of sun causing mold and placed in a septic tank.

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Why are asians so smart? Because they study very hard and learn the material.

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What do you get when you mix a racoon and a human. A Smoothie

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Quizno's footlongs are four dollars...

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How many ants does it take to fill an apartment? It depends on the size of the apartment.

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HEY are you aware of how tired your suitcase is? Sorry, I rest my case.

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Here's a joke for u Hahaha suck on it I wasnt going to make u laugh o yea ur mom died

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What does Megatron say when a video game takes forever to load? "You have failed me yet again, Start Screen!"

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Why did the Mxican eat the taco? Because he was hungry,

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Yes.

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Why was the Nazi killed? for crimes against Humanity

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Chuck Norris is a regular human being, just like the rest of us.

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Why did Harry get in the taxi? His mother told him to put his seatbelt on.

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What will you be doing right before you die? ... ... living.

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how many jews can you fit in an oven? -well zero because the conventional oven cannot fit a full sized human

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops