there are 2 sausages in a pan. one sausage says "wow it's hot in here" and the other sausage says "MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE!!!!"

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Knock Knock. KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK. ANYBODY HOME?

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One day, I was looking at my brand new wooden table, and I thought, "wow, that is a very nice brand new wooden table." And then my dog peed on it. I killed the dog.

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what did the cow said to the other cow? Moo

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a shed? A: Considering babies are incapable of rational thought it is unlikely they would understand how to employ the correct method to paint.

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What do a duck and a bike have in common? They both have handle bars except for the duck

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A man walks into a bar. He had to leave promptly because he, according to the law, was too young to be served alcohol.

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why did the chicken cros the road? Becuase the all the cars were stopped at the near by red light.

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What did Christopher Columbus say to his men before they got on the ship? "Men, get on the ship."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted honey. Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted to get to his house. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was stupid.

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What's te best part about having sex with twenty two year olds? There are 20 of them ;)

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Why doesn't Santa come in the summer? Because it's not Christmas.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was blind and deaf, leaving her unable to respond to external stimuli and thus unlikely to able to pass a basic driving test.

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A man is being followed by a large swarm of mosquitoes. He eradicates them by spraying himself with an insect repellent that has a high deet concentration.

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My mother-in-law is so ugly I actually feel quite sorry for her.

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Why was 15 afraid of 16? Coz 16 was bigger than him.

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What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede.

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why did jimmy fall of the swing? He had no arms or legs!

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Why did Billy drop his ice cream? He was hit by a bus

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what did the man say to the other man? hi

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Knock Knock Who's there? A package, the UPS man is already back in his truck.

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69

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Knock Knock Who's there? It's actually much safer to look through the peep hole than it is to let a stranger know you are home.

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a man walks into a bar, his alcoholism is slowly destroying his family

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops