When life gives you skittles, throw them at random people and say "taste the freaking rainbow!"

thumb_up thumb_down -32

a short man asked a tall man "hey hows the weather up there"? the tall man couldnt answer cause he was sucked up by a tornado that missed the short man

thumb_up thumb_down +49

a man is stranded on a deserted island with no food, water or clothing and he comes upon a magical genie lamp, a genie pops out and tells him that he has three wishes, the man asks for food,water, and clothing, the genie says "of course" the man was elated but then the genie says " but i'm afraid to tell you that genies don't exist and your hallucinating from your harsh living conditions...i'm sorry" the man lived two more weeks before dying slowly...

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What's the difference between a joke and an anti-joke? I don't know man, but you touch yourself at night.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

I asked my Grandma if she ever tried 69. And she said, “No, but I have done 53 -- that's all the sailors I could screw in one night.”

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead Why'd the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the first monkey Why'd the third monkey fall out of the tree? peer pressure Why'd the fourth monkey fall out of the tree? his girlfriend broke up with him so he commited suicide Why'd the fifth monkey fall out of the tree? cuz it was a dumbass

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Knock knock Who's there? The police Ahh shit

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Men's Rights

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What happened to the guy that fell off the building? He hit the ground

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How'd the little kid get down the stairs when nobody was home? He fell down thhem.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a scizophrenic, Or at least thats what the voices tell me.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you call a man who writes anti-jokes? Rhys, because that is my name. thank you

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What do you call a black guy going into mcdonalds A great opportunity to make a raciest joke

thumb_up thumb_down -35

why couldn't the little girl play on the swing? Matty Russel was chasing her

thumb_up thumb_down -43

What did the midget say to the clown that was blocking the doorway? Excuse me

thumb_up thumb_down -45

What is the definition of nothing? The opposite of something.

thumb_up thumb_down -49

Knock Knock? Who's their. M. M who? Me.

thumb_up thumb_down +158

What do you call a black man in space? an astronaut

thumb_up thumb_down +90

What do you say to a man, who calls you 3 AM? - "Hello!"

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Q: How mature are you on a scale of 1 to 100? A: 69. :)

thumb_up thumb_down +42

A man walks into a McDonald's and proceeds to buy a burger, unfortunately a man was robbing the fast food restaurant, what did the man do. Buy a burger

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What did Sarah Palin say as she gazed to the West? "I really wish my daughter hadn't gotten pregnant."

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A child in Africa developed Malaria. He became very sick and died.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Did you see Stevie Wonder's new house? No? Don't worry, he didn't either

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops