What's red and invisible? No Tomatoes

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had already looked both ways and there was no traffic.

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yo mama so dumb that we sat her down to take a standardized, comprehensive IQ test measuring spatial, logical, linguistic, and memorization abilities. Her aggregate score was an 87, indicated she is roughly one standard deviation below the mean of the population, which is not low enough to qualify for government assistance under the Americans with Disabilities Act (1990) but does impede her understanding of more complex abstract concepts and things pertaining to higher culture. In spite of this, she has raised a child of average intelligence, and has retained the same job at Walgreen's for 14 years, People seem to like her because she is polite and rarely late. Your mother is an inspiration to low-IQ people living in high-IQ developed countries, demonstrating that an inability to fully understand abstracts does necessarily lead to a life of meagerness and frustration, so long as you work hard, keep your spirits high, and accept Jesus Christ as your personal lord and savior.

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what little black and can make a woman scream a womans dead roting baby

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What goes about 36 miles per hour and screams? A baby attached to a ceiling fan.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Hoo. Who Hoo? You're a barn owl!

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Q: Why was the boy sad? A: He dropped his ice cream. Q: Why was the boy mad? A: He dropped his ice cream. Q: Why was the boy in pain? A: Because a clown was ripping off the boys big toes with a hacksaw, all the while causing the small boy emotional pains by killing the boy's orange cat.

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An irish man calls a black man a nigger. The offended black man then proceeds to ravenously beat the Irish man's head into a nearby curb.

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What happened when the dinosaur walked out into the rain? He got wet.

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Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

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Q : What did Piers tell his friend before leaving ? A : Bye.

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Why hasn't Justin Bieber gone through puberty. Usher Chopped his balls off.

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Knock knock! Who's there? an atheist. an atheist who oh sorry, I forgot atheists don't knock on people's doors

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if japanese cars are called riceburners would german cars be called jewburners

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Whats worse than a dead baby in a puddle of blood? A dead baby in soup.

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? Comfortably, four.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

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Why did the alien cross the road. To get to his ship.

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because no human can.

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why did the rabit lose the race? it was a dumb@$$

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What did the doctor say to the terminally ill patient? Your going to die.

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Why was the brick acting yellow? No, because it's allowed via Tuesday.

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A black guy and a white guy walk into a bar, they were both unemployed and blowing their savings on their alcohol addictions

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A man walks into a restaurant and orders a rare steak. Soon after, he gets food poisoning.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops