A priest, a rabbi, and a Buddhist monk walk into a bar. They discuss their differences over a pint of beer and leave with a greater understanding of each other's faiths.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was very mad at his mother, so he ran away, and, on the other side of the road, he saw a ver luxurious chicken coop. In other words, duh.

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Roses are green Violets are yellow I have an optical disorder

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have five finger and the middle is for you

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Knock knock Who's there? I'm the Dick I'm the dick who? I'm the Dick Cheney

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What's broken to the side of the road and covered in cookie crumbs? A girlscout that got hit by a car.

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Advice from a pro: Don't be a faggot

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A man dressed in a white sheet shows up at an African American's door, they sit in the living room drinking coffee and watching the weather.

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What did the nurse say to the man who got an erection while being given a sponge bath? She assured him it was a normal reaction and moved on to clean his arms.

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What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede.

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Two ducks are sitting on washcloths in the middle of a lake. One duck looks to the other and asks, "hey, do you have any soap?" to which the other duck responds, "what do you think I am, a typewriter?"

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When does the narwhal bacon? When the universe looses its realism to the point where every animals' meat is bacon at a certain time, and a person hunts a narwhal at the crack of dawn when there is a triple rainbow and the narwhal's DNA is combined with a pig's just long enough for the meat to be bacon when the person shoots it.

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What did a tampon say to the other tampon? Nothing, they were both stuck up bitches.

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What's big, wet and hairy? Not what you think it is.

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because he was too much of a bitch to when his friends dared him.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Fred. Hello Fred.

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What do you do when you see a mentally challenged kid in a wheelchair? Walk up and offer to push him, as you should since he probably hasn't had a lot of friends in his lifetime.

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A. Why did John survive the plane crash? B. Because he was master chief and he is awesom although cortana did not which John is sad about naturally.

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How do you kill a crackhead Put her in a shredder and put the remainings in your ex wifes refrigerator

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roses are red violets are blue i suck at poetry show me your tits

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because no human can.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was blind and deaf, leaving her unable to respond to external stimuli and thus unlikely to able to pass a basic driving test.

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How do you spell dog? C-A-T!

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what is brown and shaped like a tree?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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