What did the smoker get for christmas? A bike.

America

what do you get when you combine fire and water? alcohol

4 is half the number 8 is.

A horse walks into a bar the barkeeper asks 'Why the long face?' The horse, incapable of speaking English, walked around in a circle, excreated and left.

A black man walked into a bar. Had a drink, and left.

What's the difference between a black man and a large pizza One is an ethnicity derived from Africa and One is an Italian dish that is well'ly known in all four corners of the world.

Why does Shaun's dad beat him? Because Shaun is an asshole.

Are You McDonalds Because I'm Loving It

Anyone reading this I'm not writing anything Kevin

A man walks in to a wooden door. He's blind.

Why did Suzy's neck hurt? Because it was broken

Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

Why does your mom not love you.... Because she is not your real mom.

Whats blue and fuzzy? blue fuzz.

How many licks does it take for a pedophile to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? Given a simple random sample of pedophiles, they will most likely have the same statistical standard normal distribution of tongue sizes and saliva efficacy as any other part of the population. Therefore, that question in regards to the tongues of pedophiles is irrelevant and remains unanswered.

Why did Uncle Monty shove his head up a horses arse? Because it gave Doris an erection. She chose to keep her male genital organs following her gender changing procedure, so that she could still father children.

How many Jews can you fit in a car? Comfortably, four.

I'm hungry.

Guess what i realized when i became 18? I was 18

Q: what's black and white and red all over? A: someone getting murderd on a news paper

What's worse than your mom finding out she has AIDS? After she found out she had AIDS she stormed out of the hospital and got run over by a bus.

What did the picture say to the man? Don't frame me

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor? -Cody Williams

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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