- Anti Joke

What's the difference between a pheromone and a hormone? Hormones are secreted internally and trigger various biochemical pathways that cause certain effects. We all are familiar with the effects of testosterone and estrogen, both on the anatomy, and behaviour of humans. Pheromones are secreted externally, and have an effect on another creature in similar ways. Usually they have to do with attracting sexual partners or changing a sex partners behaviour or body in some way.

What did the def blind mute kid get for christmas? He doesnt know either

Roses are red Violets are blue There are other flowers in the world But you wouldn't know it from this poem.

So a baby seal walks into a club...

Why did the clown go to jail? For 23 charges of rape and murder.

What is the answer to the question of life? Over 9000

A homeless guy gets done with his daily work. where does he go? nowhere he is homeless...

What do you call a gay couple with jobs and a kid?? Responsible.

What did the white guy say to the black guy? What's up?

Bumsniffer

What did Little Jimmie say to his mom when he got home frome school? Nothing his moms dead.

what do you do to gay guy who wants to have anal sex with you? beat him with a steel baseball bat in his face.

Q: How did Mary get frostbite A: Her mother locked her in a freezer

Why did the ship crash into Italy? Because a woman took over driving it!

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the first monkey why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? monkey see monkey do why did the fourth monkey fall out of the tree? peer pressure why did the refridgerator fall out of the tree? it lost its footing why did the girl fall down? she was hit by four monkeys and a refridgerator

What is a life without options.... an optionless life

Fucked up quotes: "When walking trough hell, keep going!" (I just turn back and walk the other way thank you, I mean worst case I walk trough heaven right?" "Never give up, ever ever ever ever ever..." (Ill just end it with etc because I gave up something as hard as... Typing?) "Curiosity killed the cat" (Translated: "Curiosity kills, stay inside forever" What?)

CRY

Your momma is so stupid Her iq must be below 50

What do you get if you mix a Bulldog and a Shih tzu? A new breed of dog.

A man with Tourette's syndrome walks into a bar. Because of his disease, he shouts unexpected profanities across the room, and everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the humiliation anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom, pulls out a gun, and points it at his head. His wife walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and he notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to make. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. Shocked and afraid, he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentenced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man still suffers from Tourette's and cannot control his ticks and rots in jail. He continues to scream random obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

How Many Blondes does it take to open a fridge. 1 Because most blondes are smart and can open fridges.

a jew, a latino and an aboriginal walk into a bar this is an example of a great inter-racial comunity

I scream, You scream, The police come, It's awkward.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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