what did the tomato say when he was cut open? nothing, because vegetables are unable to speak

thumb_up thumb_down -13

what's the difference between a dead baby and a lamborghini? I don't have a lamborghini in my garage!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do women and airplanes have in common? They both have cockpits!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the audience walk out of the movie? Because it had just finished.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Knock Knock [Opens Door]

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Kumquats Daffodils Alka-Seltzer Serendipity Dewey Decimal System Buccaneer Avuncular Pantaloons Weasels Alligator Chewbacca Sasquatch

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What drops its lunch every day? Yo mom

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q: What did the dog say to the cat? A: animals don't talk

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why can't black people be in a talent show? Because they'll steal the show.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why can't a blonde swim? Because in this economy her parents never took her to a pool in which she could get swimming lessons and practice to be able to be a good or maybe great swimmer.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

knock knock who's there auntie auntie who? anti-joke

thumb_up thumb_down -13

An Englishman, an Irishman, a Frenchman, a Scottish man, an Australian, a German, a Spaniard, an Icelandic man, a Norwegian, a Swede, a Dane, an Italian, a Morrocan, an American, an Algerian, an Egyptian, a Syrian, an Israelite, a Chinese man, a Russian, a Japanese man, an Indian and a Brazilian all walk into a bar. It was a large bar.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

i used to think i had the coolest secret handshake with helen keller. then i realized she was talking sh*t about me

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What does God say when a balck person is person is borned? "Another burnt one"

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Romeny or Obama? Obamney

thumb_up thumb_down -13

anti-joke.com

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's an Anti Joke?

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didnt, the chicken is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

penis

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q: what did the dad get for playing baseball with his son? A: a line drive to his balls

thumb_up thumb_down -13

hi

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why is six afraid of seven. Because seven is a rapist.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What is red and bad for your teeth? A BRICK!!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

what do u get when you cross a monkey, a sock and wheels? A: a sock monkey. I was kidding about the wheels

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops