Q:What the difference between a piano and a guitar A: Nothing, there both instruments and i lied about the difference

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Last words of a redneck - "Hold my beer and watch this"

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WHY DO JEWS HATE GERMANY? THEY DON'T THEY FORGAVE THE NAZIS :-) ( . )( . ) -------

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What's the difference between a horse and a unicorn? Horses are real.

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What is worse than the Holocaust? Women's sports

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whats worse than jonny james obviously

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What s the difference between a pigeon ?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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roses are grey violets are grey im color blind

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because it's in a chicken coop.

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There is a wire, Let's put it on fire, The fire spread so did your legs, Now were both lying dead on your bed.

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why was the man sad? he found out his wife was man .

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TEST! ACTUALLY READ THIS! 1. How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator? Open the refrigerator, put in the giraffe, and close the door. 2. How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator? Open the refrigerator, take out the giraffe, put in the elephant and close the door. 3. The King of the Forest is hosting an animal conference. All the animals attend except one. Which animal does not attend? The Elephant. The elephant is in the refrigerator. You just put him in there. This tests your memory. 4. There is a river you must cross but it is inhabited by crocodiles. How do you manage it? You swim across. All the crocodiles are attending the animal conference.

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What's funnier than my jokes? your face.

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suck my balls mr.garison

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why did the chicken cross the road? regardless of the fact his job at kfc was there, he felt that exercise was need to work off is thighs

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A penguin is driving through the desert when his car breaks down. He has it towed to a service station in the nearest town to be repaired. The mechanic tells him that it may be a while so he might want to take a stroll around town, find something to do for a while and check back a little later for an update. The penguin decides that as it is so hot in the desert town, and he is accustomed to a much cooler climate, he might enjoy a bit of ice cream. He walks to the local ice cream parlor, orders a large vanilla cone, and proceeds to devour the treat in a flash, covering himself in ice cream in the process. He has ice cream on his flippers, his face, and all down his stomach; he is virtually covered in the white, sticky goo. Upon returning to the service station to check in on the mechanic and his car, the mechanic say to him, "Well, it looks like the seal on your head gasket leaked, the transmission is shot, and you appear to be covered in ice cream." To which the penguin replies, "Yes, I have made quite the mess of myself. Today just isn't my day."

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Why did sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not sally.

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How do you prevent a baby from crawling all over the place? You nail his hands to the floor

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What is worse than being unemployed? Terminal Cancer

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anti jokes are like chickens. they arent funny at all. which makes them funny...

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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye-patch? Names

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A dog walks into a bar and the bartender gives him a bowl of water because it is hot outside and he doesn't want the dog to dehydrate because he could die.

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Tip for Employers: Avoid hiring unlucky people by immediately tossing half the resumes into the bin.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops