two scientists walk into a bar. one says, "i want h2o." the other says, "i want h2o too." the bartender gives them both water and nobody dies because he is not irresponsible enough to give someone concentrated hydrogen peroxide as a drink.

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Did you hear about the guy that dropped the soap in prison? He apparently gripped it a bit too tightly causing it to slip out of his hands, but managed to pick it up promptly and finish showering with no further incidence.

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Guy1:should I ask this girl out? Guy2:NO!!!!!!! Guy1:????????

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Person: kk Person1: did you just kk me? Person: no

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Why was the anti joke funny? because it wasn't funny.

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Q: How did the black man get to the first branch on the tree? A: He climbed, like the average person.

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Whats worse then biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into an apple and finding half a worm. Wats worse then biting into an apple and finding half a worm? Biting into an eggplant and finding half a worm, as eggplants are usually more expensive so you will have wasted more money and would probably not be willing to eat the rest. And eggplants taste like shit.

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You know what's really funny? Cancer What's funnier than that? The Holocaust Even funnier? Charlie Sheen

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What is black, white and red all over? Many things.

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Why did the family have no Christmas tree this year? Because they are Jewish.

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What's the difference between a bike and a black man? I don't know how to ride a bike.

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What did the mute guy say to the deaf guy? Nothing. He can't talk, just makes awful noises and hand gestures.

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how do you make a plumber cry kill his family LOLOLOLOLOLOL

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Knock Knock. Whose there? ..............

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what do jason kidd and michael jackson have in common? they are both actually black

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Rose are Red Violets are blue I have 5 fingers The middle one is for you.

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Whats 2+2=? ?= CHICKEN

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Q:Why did the bunny run up the hill? A:Because he can't run under it.

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Roses are blue violets are red I think I'm getting drunk get me to my van

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Type better antijokes above

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Fine, just give me the top comment FOREVER, and I wont LIEK completely copy and assimilate your identity on Horsehead network... Forever... Muahahahahahaha!

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Why was the Mexican in pain? Someone hit him with a frying pan 5 times across the face.

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Yeah, Eliza, its me, its so strange, you are the only one I remember from highschool, I was worried you had forgotten about me, anyway, yeah type as if you where speaking to him, and dont worry, I know I could not keep a secret back then, and I told Nero, so and he promised me he would kindly break my fingers if I told anyone, besides I dont do that anymore trust me.

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Q: Why couldn't the man lick his ice cream? A: Because his body shut down due to the fact that a bullet went straight through his brain. This happened before he could even order his ice cream.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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