what happen to the popo who got arrested? he told himself that he had the right to remain silent

You wanna know something that's totally out of this world? The moon.

what did the indian boy say to his friend? I wish you were real

Why did the chicken cross the street? He wanted to make breakfast

What does Helen Keller's parents do when she gets in trouble? They leave the plunger in the toilet!!!

A child logs on to antijoke.com he is a chronic masturbator

What did the DJ play at the disco? What's that coming over the hill Is it a monster? Is it a monster? What's that coming over the hill Is it a monster? Is it a monster? What's that coming over the hill Is it a monster? Is it a monster? What's that coming over the hill? Confused, mind bruised, it seeps out It seeps out, it seeps out Face down, home town looks so grey Looks so grey, looks so grey Convexed you bend, twist and shout Twist and shout, twist and shout Stand up brush off get moving Get moving, get moving What's that coming over the hill Is it a monster? Is it a monster? (x4) Face down, home town, face down, home town Face down, home town, it looks so grey (x4) What's that coming over the hill Is it a monster? Is it a monster? (x4) More lyrics: http://www.lyricsmania.com/monster_lyrics_automatic_the.html All about Automatic The: http://www.musictory.com/music/Automatic+The

A horse walks into a bar. The Bartender says "Why the long face?" The Bartender is then put into a lunatic asylum for hallucinating and trying to communicate with said hallucinations.

Why does it take 7 years for Harry Potter to kill Voldemort? Voldemort is a very powerful wizard and Harry Potter is just learning magic at the beginning so he is not prepared to fight him.

There's a skunk and a lawyer standing on the side of the road, what's the difference? There are tire marks infront of the skunk.

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She was blind.

why can't timmy tie his shoes? Because timmy's an earth-worm

A little boy walks up to his father and asks his father to explain the birds and bees. The father then proceeds to rape the little boy.

A man with a mustache enters your parents home to tell them you were kidnapped and taken to the pier 1 hour away. They leave and he goes upstairs to rape you for 1 hour. Never trust people with mustaches.

whats orange, green and has a treadmill attached to it? a cantaloupe, i lied about the treadmill.

there is a blonde, red head, and brunet held captive in afghanistan. The people say whats your last word to the red head, she says tornado... they turned and she escaped, they say to the brunet what is your last word, she says tsunami.. they turn and she escaped. They go to the blonde and say what is your last word, she says fire... she is then shot rapidly and she dies.

Your mama's p*ssy is so stank, she should probably consult her physician as she may have an easily treatable infection.

canadians

What's one very bad way to injure yourself? Smashing your head against a metal surface

Why did Jimmy cross the road? Because a chicken was about to cross the road, and he wanted to be kind and help the old 72-aged chicken get across the road. Because Jimmy had a grandfather that passed away because he was too old and nobody helped him cross the road. Jimmy is haunted by that memory and doesn't want that to happen to anyone else. Especially a chicken.... Also there were no cars and his best friend chicken was on the other side waiting for him.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because Osama Bin Laden is dead.

what's blue and goes blub blub? a blue blub blub

What is funnier than 24? The fact that you think numbers are funny?

What did the man say to the teacup? Nothing. He was drunk and on the floor.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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