A dog walks into a bar. The bartender was just about to leave, so he takes the dog home with him. He makes found dog signs and posts them around the neighborhood. The owner sees one of the signs and retrieves his pet from the bartender, thanking him for finding his dog.

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Whats the difference imbetween a watermelon and a baby? One is fun to hit with a sledge hammer an the other is a watermelon

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His sons funeral was on the other side.

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What do you get if you mix a Bulldog and a Shih tzu? A new breed of dog.

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A mother took her little boy to church. While in church the little boy said, "Mommy, I have to pee." The mother said to the little boy, "It's not appropriate to say the word 'pee' in church. So, from now on whenever you have to 'pee' just tell me that you have to 'whisper.'" Then the mother, realizing how her son could later become confused, clarified. She said, "You can say you have to pee as long as you say it in a quiet voice." The boy understood. There were no problems afterwards.

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What's the difference between a pizza and a black man? It would be cannibalism to eat a black man.

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whats the difference between a black man and a terd ? one is a black man the other is a terd

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why did dominic buy a new speaker on holiday because his parents died and his was at home

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What Is big, round, and looks like gaben. Gaben!

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What happens when you cut down a tree? It falls over.

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When do you call 911? When you need help with do something that you either can't do alone or can't control

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How do you get a black man down from a tree? If the man cannot climb down himself, perhaps call the fire department.

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Yo momma is so ugly, that she has no mirrors in her home to avoid the feeling of disgust and sadness she gets whenever she sees her reflexion

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Why did the boy not wake up on time for school? He was fucking dead.

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What's worse than a dead baby in a trash can? A dead baby in 10 trash cans.

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Q: What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the car? A: Get in the car.

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An early jewish man walks into a bar where a number of stormtroopers have gathered for drinks and is taken into custody.

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Why did the man say ow? He got his dick caught in his zipper.

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Are you one of those gay rapists that flame around telling people no all the time?

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you: knock knock person: who's there you: interrupting cow person: interrupting cow you:MOOOOOOOOO

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Why did the little pig squeal? Because he was going through blades at a slaughter house.

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what do you call an exited rectangle? an Erectangle

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What did the man with no teeth say? I need some teeth.

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How many kids with A.D.D. does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Wanna go for a bike ride?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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