How many dead babies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Trick Question. Baby's aren't smart enough comprehend changing light bulbs

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What do you call a Black pilot? A pilot! What else would you call him, racist!

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1: Why did the chicken cross the road? 2: The chicken has a right to privacy, stop questioning what she does

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Roses are red My binoculars are blue The curtains are open I see you

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Why doesn't Santa come in the summer? Because it's not Christmas.

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How many chickens does it take to screw in a light bulb? Any number of chickens plus one person.

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Getting rape.d by a giant scorpion.

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Why did the dog cross the road? He was on a walk with his owner so they used a crosswalk to safely get back home.

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Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research.

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What do you get when you mix a racoon and a human. A Smoothie

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Why'd the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he has Obsessive Complusive Disorder.

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Your momma's so fat that when she uses a hoolahoop, she gets tired after one try and has to stop.

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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What do you call a man covered in magnets? Attractive

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why did jimmy fall of the swing? He had no arms or legs!

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Why was the Nazi killed? for crimes against Humanity

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A woman walks into a sex sop, she buys a dildo.

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Chuck Norris is a regular human being, just like the rest of us.

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What goes about 36 miles per hour and screams? A baby attached to a ceiling fan.

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How do you a baby into a small bowl? Put it in the blender. How to u get it out? Tostitos.

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why did the duck cross the road? More than likely there was something that appeals to the duck on the other side such as a pond or duck food. On the contrary there could also be something that did not appeal to the duck on the side from which he is departing from such as a lack of a pond or a lack of duck food.

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How do you keep a blonde busy? The best way to keep somebody busy is to make sure they have something to do, like get a job or a hobby or do some chores. The color of their hair is irrelevant.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops