An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

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A: Knock knock B: Who’s there? A: The police B: The police who? A: Ma’am, your son is dead.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Cuz the chicken crossed the road

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A guy walks into a bar. He now has a broken collar bone.

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Knock knock! Who's there? an atheist. an atheist who oh sorry, I forgot atheists don't knock on people's doors

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

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What's the square root of 69? 8.306623862918075

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whats worse than Brussels sprouts brussels sprouts that has petite vegetation, lack of sun causing mold and placed in a septic tank.

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why did the chicken cros the road? Becuase the all the cars were stopped at the near by red light.

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A. Why did John survive the plane crash? B. Because he was master chief and he is awesom although cortana did not which John is sad about naturally.

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What did the squirrel say to the dog? "I have AIDS."

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How do you spell dog? C-A-T!

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Why were there only 5,000 Mexicans at the Battle of Alamo? They only had 1250 trucks.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Approximately 75 pounds of wood a day

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How do you torture Helen Keller? Waterboarding.

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Word play, punch-line, joke.

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roses are red, violets are blue, i have adhd, OH A CHEESEPUFF

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There once was a man from Nantucket.

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A blonde, brunette, and a red head were walking on the side of the road and a fridge landed on them and they died. At least they still could go to their funerals.

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Why was the wife not in the kitchen? The husband's gay.

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you want to hear a joke? the goverment.

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they say that cancer can't pass but why do three our your uncles have it

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What do you call a man covered in magnets? Attractive

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What did the man on a business trip to Japan say to his wife on the phone? The nuclear reactor in the next city over is melting down as we speak. If I don't see you again, I love you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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