How do you keep a blonde busy? The best way to keep somebody busy is to make sure they have something to do, like get a job or a hobby or do some chores. The color of their hair is irrelevant.

thumb_up thumb_down +65

whats funny with two wheels? A kid falling off his bike

thumb_up thumb_down +47

What's the difference between a badger and a TV? Alot.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

What's worse than seeing your grandma naked. nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

A: Ask me if I'm a truck. B: Are you a truck? A: No.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why would someone smile at a tumble weed? I don't know, it's an inanimate object.And is ugly Just like the couch in the basement in That 70's Show.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

I asked my Grandma if she ever tried 69. And she said, “No, but I have done 53 -- that's all the sailors I could screw in one night.”

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A horse walks into a bar why the long face? I have aids

thumb_up thumb_down +15

whats worse than Brussels sprouts brussels sprouts that has petite vegetation, lack of sun causing mold and placed in a septic tank.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A priest walks into a bar, which is suprising because priests don't usually go to bars.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

How do you make a baby cry? Break its legs.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

I have no soul so I must consume yours

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Yo mamma's so fat, she died of diabeties and we all mourn her loss.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

I have Alzheimer's, but at least I don't have Alzheimer's.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

boobs

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I am colourblind so screw you!

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What did the girl fruit say to the boy fruit when he wanted to marry her? "No."

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Doctor, Doctor, I think I'm a canary! Yes, you are.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What did the psychiatrist say to the man when he walked into his office naked and wrapped in saran wrap? I can see your 'nuts'...

thumb_up thumb_down -45

Why did Sally drown? She wasn't wearing a life jacket and it was the the seventh time she had fallen off her water skis today. Her father was not coming back this time.

thumb_up thumb_down -61

A man walks into a bar. He's covered in Ash because the north tower just collapsed.

thumb_up thumb_down -75

A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

thumb_up thumb_down -121

what do you call a black guy who flies planes? a pilot

thumb_up thumb_down +62

What's big, wet and hairy? Not what you think it is.

thumb_up thumb_down +54

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops