Why doesn't Micheal Jackson do a music video with Usher? Because he is dead.

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A paraplegic walks into a bar.

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Why did the black man crash his car? His low-income job forced him to buy a toyota.

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Q: Why did the little girl fall off the swing? A: She didn't have any arms.

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How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? ...hey, it's kinda fun to type tootsie... ...tootsie tootsie tootsie...

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What do you call it when a black man and a Mexican open up a fast-food restaurant together? A joint venture.

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What did the two best friends do before the asteroid hit the Earth? They hugged each other goodbye.

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A student exclaimed "This test is a piece of cake!" He ate it.

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roses aren't red, violets aren't blue, they're all black, cause i'm colorblind. what about you?

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What did the prisoner say to the other prisoner? I am going to anally rape you.

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What do cookies and Ruber have in common? Ones edible one is not

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What looks like donuts but stinks of shit. Sean Big Macs socks

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A wild bear walks into a bar, grabs a drink and looks at the man next to it. The man then wakes up from a dream and gets ready for work.

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Why did the fat man fall off the balcony? He didn't, I pushed him.

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Q.) What did the young child of a highly idiosyncratic family do when he heard the fire-alarm going off unexpectedly in his house? A.) He started to panic since he hadn't received any portions of formal insturction in the art of, "Stop, drop and roll", prior to the moment of the lamentable catastrophe. I think that we should blame his parents/teachers immediately... *Sigh*

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What do you call a moving tree? A hurricane killing thousands of people and 3 dogs.

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Stoner Student: "Imagine if El Nino and La Nina got together and started a family and had little Los Ninos." Class Nerd: "Yeah."

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When a blonde entered a bar, she ordered a something that was a double-entendre. The bartender understood what she was trying to say, gave her her order whatever alcohol she happened to consume, and the blonde woman could not have been more courteous.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to his mother's funeral.

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What did the fly say when he went to Dunkin Donuts? Can I have a doughnut?

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A rock walks into a bar. The town goes into extreme panic and is abandoned because rocks are inanimate objects.

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why did the movie get bad reviews? it was a bad movie

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What do a grape and an airplane have in common? They both have wings! except not the grape.

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After thinking hard for a very long time, the pig realized he was a fat, worthless piece of shit.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops