Why did the downtown New York worker never make it home? An airplane crashed into his office.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

How do asians chop their food? CHOPSTICKS! Moral: Yeah that one sucked... ON PURPOSE! Now you dont have to feel inferior ALL the time, you feel equal even though you arent! Ill allow you :D

thumb_up thumb_down -15

There once was a man named Steve. One day, Steve stumbled stupidly, shredding his shirt, shoes and shorts and subsequently shocking Susie; a small shy salsa student. When he arrived home, Steve's wife asked "how was your day dear?" Steve panicked at the thought of having to explain this traumatic event, but thankfully he had undergone speech therapy for his lisp.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A man and his horse walk into a bar, he is told to leave because animals are not allowed on the property

thumb_up thumb_down -17

How do you get 1,000 dead babies into a car? Blender. How do you get them out? Well you shouldn't. Leave the car in front of somebody that you hate's house.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Henry was struck by a train. He was mourned by his parents.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

why did Mark Nara cross the road idk why? he didnt

thumb_up thumb_down -17

How do you get a clown off a swing? Hit him with an ax.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

once there where 3 guys on a beach. they found a bottle and a fetis came out.. later they found out 2 of the 3 had cancer and the 3rd was a vegetable.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Roses are red Violets are blue This doesn't rhyme F*ck it

thumb_up thumb_down -17

How do you find out how many Mexicans are living in the United States? Take a Census.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Ed Milliband looks like an amphibian.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

1 + 1 = 11 Just kidding, it's 2 you moron.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Whats the difference between a pizza and a baby? Humans don't eat babies, other than a Cannibals because some tend to eat babies.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

I think I am done here friend, it always comes to this, it has always been easier for me to repair whatever is wrong with others and get my kicks out of that, as I know I can and will repair everything wrong with myself, but its hard as hell, I mean I never give up, ever. But that does not change the fact that I am broken, and that simply deciding that I am not, is far from enough, its a choice indeed, but its like deciding to constantly walk trough hell, and sometimes that hell is also called living, that too is always a choice, And believe me, I would never quit, I guess that if this hell I struggle trough has so many nice things in it, it just feels like hell at times. I mean the main motivation behind my ability to help others, has always been searching for answers low and high, and when what I have learned trough life helps others, but barely scratches the surface of the armor I am confined within, I lose hope, do you believe that my desire to help humanity grow, derived from my own incompetence at curing myself?

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A man decided to commit suicide. He did.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did the President give his wife for her birthday? Women's Rights.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

you and your family will die tonight

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What is yellow and smells like a flower? A yellow flower :)

thumb_up thumb_down -17

ok, a family walks into a talant agency, the talent agent says "What can you do". The family breaks out into a sing and dance routine, and do nothing sexual in their routine.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the mexican cross the road? His drugs were on the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Roses are red Violets are blue This is a poem The End

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why was the black girl happy? She got a raise.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

I was approached the other day by an officer as he asked... "Son where are your parents?" I replied, "I dont know i'm an orphan" The officer then laughed and walked away

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops