Person 1: Can I ask you a question? Person 2: You just did.

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how long does it take a meth-head to rob your flat? not long at all, and they'll take everything. they need to, it's an addiction

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You really need some help in spelling the word GOD... Anyway, none of your fucking business.I am a child for this scenario only so... Moral: LET THAT CHILD ALONE!

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How many kids with A.D.D. does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Wanna go for a bike ride?

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woman's rights

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It is Scientifically proven that, if you have a shower in china... you get wet

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How do u make a hockey player cry You Kill his entire family

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what do you call a baby rapest jordan gregg

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why did the chicken cross the road ask jake darby

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Ask me if I'm a kangaroo Are you a Kangaroo? No….

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What do you call a puppy in alaska? A cold PUPPY!!!!!

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How do you fit 10 dead babies in a bowl? A blender How do you get them out? Chips

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How do you get black children to stop jumping on the bed? Tell them it's not allowed and that consequences will ensue if the rules are not followed.

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KOOKABURRA

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I had a chocolate chip cookie today, thats it, just a chocolate chip cookie.

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What do you call someone with the world biggest encyclopedia on their head? Dead.

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There is a bomb. It blows up and kills 26 people.

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25

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A guy walks into a bar and tells the bartender to give him any drink. The bartender gives him the drink and the customer instantly dies. Another person in the bar asked the bartender what dring did you give him. He answered back.....poison

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Rose are Red Violets are blue I have 5 fingers The middle one is for you.

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What's big, white, and when it falls out of a tree, it can kill you? A refrigerator.

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Q: What do you get when you cross an Elephant and a Rhinoceros? A: Merriam-Webster defines "cross" as "an affliction that tries one's virtue, steadfastness, or patience." This comedic exercise is one such affliction.

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He was. I am sorry, he knows to much, this is for the well being of everyone, including yourself, he will be going down, the order has been given.

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops