What did the teacher say to the student? You failed science

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Roses are red Violets are blue, I am sorry... But you have terminal cancer and are probably going to die in about 3 months

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Why did the crack addict see colors. He was looking at the northern lights

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I got to go now Gonna take a poo.

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How many black people does it take to change a light bulb? Zero, they already stole them all.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side!

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How did Jane fall off the swing? Jane had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Jane.

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Q: What's blue and smells like baby. A: A choking baby.

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how do you get a cat out of a tree? with boomerangs

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Doctor, doctor, it hurts when I hit my head with a hammer!! Dont hit your head with a hammer anymore.

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How do you get 100 midgets into a mini? You have to manufacture a mini big enough to accommodate 100 midgets. It won't be street legal, but at least your problem with fitting the midgets in the mini is solved.

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A farmer was robbed and complained to the sheriff's department that he suspected it was a black man behind the crime. "How do you know this for sure?" The sheriff asked him. He replied, "I chased him into the night, it was dark and I couldn't see him"

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What is more worse than death? Death

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Your mom is so fat, she suffers from heart disease, high blood pressure, and type 2 diabetes.

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"Free to play" Play free "right now"

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What did the red cat say to his owner? Nothing.

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look in the sky! its a bird, its a plane........ Its Miles

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Your mother is so fat; I love fat fat people.

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Why was the American patriot sad that Bin-Laden was killed? Because he wanted to take him back to America to touture him.

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How do you get a one armed man out of a tree? you throw a fridge at him

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Fun fact: Steel wool comes from the fleeces of iron sheep.

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Whats worse than bitting into a apple and finding a worm? Being the worm who just lost nearly half his whole house because some jerk decided to eat an apple on the ground, whom after eating the apple destroyed the worms self-esteem by making the comparison to the worse thing possible. Or being raped by Zeus in the form of a worm.

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Two fish are swimming and hit a cement wall. One fish says Dam.

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Why did billy fall down the stairs? He got pushed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops