Sticks and stones may break my bones and they can also break cars.

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what starts with an f and ends with a uck? firetruck!!

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A grasshopper walks into a bar... Bartender: "hey we have a drink named after you!" Grasshopper: "What, Kevin?"

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Two giraffes walk into a bar, hit their heads, cracktheir skulls and die.

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what happend to Helen Keller when she fell in a hole She climed out of the hole

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I saw a coin one day but never picked it up. It was still there the next day and then the day after that when it was still there I saw a girl being sick on it...

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Neither Has He.

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What's worse than taking a bite in an apple and finding a worm in it? Taking a bite and finding half a worm.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are unintelligent creatures of instinct, and can tell no significant differences between the pavement and the road. It was unfortunate that a bus was speeding past at the moment this event happened.

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Why didn't the Hawaiian man know how to surf? He lives in Kansas

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Why didn't the 9-year-old girl go to school on monday? Because she lived in a country where women don't have rights and was traded as a commodity for 2 pigs to be a wife for a 43 year old man.

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Whats worse than losing your car keys? Watching your 4 year old son get visciously raped by a 20stone sex hungry pedophile and knowing you cant do anything about it because the sex hungry pedophile is your dad and he is the alpha male of the family so he has full mating rights.

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Q: Waiter! What's this fly doing in my soup? A: Oh, I'm terribly sorry sir, I’ll replace this with a fresh bowl of soup and I’ll have a word with the manager to see if we can deduct a sum from your bill for the inconvenience we have caused you

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Laugh

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Four men were walking, and three of them walked into a bar. The fourth one ducked.

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What are we ? Students ! What do we want ? Six months holiday ! When do we want it ? Twice a year !

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Yo momma so fat,she went on a diet and now exersizes regularly

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Why did the man stop eating? Because he took an arrow to the knee.

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A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

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you first

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A flea walks into a bar. Nobody notices because it is a very small insect

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So a dog walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "Quickly, someone give me the number for animal control."

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Donkey lips

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Pick up Lines skeet skeet skeet! JLR

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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