What's the only thing a Black Hole can't absorb? Nothing. It absorbs everything, even light.

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Whats has no comedic value? A brick

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What did the elephant say to the clown? Swell, morning isn't it?

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Why did the man cross the road? He was hungry and homeless, and in search of chicken.

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What's worse than getting shot in the face? Nothing really because that could leave you seriously handicapped for the remainder of your life or there is a good chance that you are dead.

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A dyslexic agnostic insomniac stays up at night wondering if there's a dog.

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racism...deal with it!

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Jerry: Hey, do you smell that? It kinda smells like updog. Moe: What's updog?

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Why did the cat bite its owner? Because the owner had been dead for several days and the cat was locked in the house with nothing else to eat.

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What starts with a 's' and ends in 'ex'? Sex -XH

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He was. I am sorry, he knows to much, this is for the well being of everyone, including yourself, he will be going down, the order has been given.

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What's the difference between a bird? Both legs are the same, especially the left one

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So there's a man named Moses. He prays to God for a donkey to transport him from Bethlahem to Jerusalem. God granted his wish. God said" To make the donkey go, you must say Hallelujah. To make it stop you say Go". Moses rode off happily. Suddenly the donkey went off trail and was headed towards a steep cliff. Moses kept saying stop, stop, stop. He remembered what God had said, and had said Go. They stopped one inch before falling down. Moses thanked the lord and said " Thank You Jesus, Hallelujah." And down they went.

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Dos Equis took down chuck Norris

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What should you do if you come across a slut with a fork up her @ss and a gun in her hand? Do not look at her and walk away.

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Doctor, my husband tells me he doesn't like my figure .... That's irrelevant now, you've contracted a rare blood disease and will be dead within a month.

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if ruddell was gay what would he be? a gay prick

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Q: Where can you find a cat with no arms and no legs? A: Right where you left him Q: Where can you find a dog with no arms and no legs? A: In a bun

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why did the girl with no arms or legs get for christmas? A wheelchair

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<!-- alert('I lost the game'); -->

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Q: Why was the baby crying? A: I kicked it.

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How do you get a cat out of a tree? Throw a jar of foreskin at it.

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how do you fit 100 jews in a mini ? two in the front, two in theback and 96 in the ash tray

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Why did Tiger look in the toilet? It doesn't matter, he didn't find anything.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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