Some people are like Slinkies: they don't work as well as they say they will and you'll get bored of them quickly.

"Want to hear something ironic?" ...he said to the deaf man.

What did Kim Kardashian say when she got a breast implant? DERP!

Why was the young women crying Because her fiancé who was battling a severe Case of pneumonia just passed away

Have you ever tasted Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

What's the difference between a plane and a Muslim dentist? A plane hasn't dedicated its life to the study of dentistry

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey.

have you heard of the new german microwave? it seats about 30

How do you make a tissue dance? Blow a little boogie in it!

Knock knock, Who's there The delivery man The delivery man who Just take this package

Getting an STD. What's worse than mixing up the order of the joke and the punchline?

What do u call two mexicans playing basketball? Juan on Juan!

If your uncle jack helped you off your horse, would you help your uncle jack off a horse? Yes

a black man and his girlfriend are in a car, who is driving? the cop

(waving left hand) Why doesn't Queen Elizabeth wave with this hand? Why? Because this is my hand.

When is a door not a door? When your burns down.

5 little monkeys jumping on the bed. one fell off and bumped his head. momma called the doctor and the doctor said "your son is now a vegetable. he can no longer use his brain for things such as moving, talking, or eating. you are going to have to take care of him for the rest of his life. it is also going to be a burden on you and your husband because taking care of someone in this condition is very expensive, and could end up costing thousands of dollars each year."

What do you call a dead man in a ditch? Phil.

Q: What do you call a Muslim controlling a plane? A: A pilot.

What do you call a blind man on a jet ski? Dead.

Why did the dinosaurs die out? Because you touch yourself at night.

when a midget takes weed, does he get high or medium???

Whats red and yellow? A chicken in the blender.

This is not a joke

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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